i miss those days when life is simpler, less complicated, less stressful, and perhaps, a little happier?
its not as thou i have a childood that is soooo beautiful as those u find in fairy tales. mine is more like the one of cinderella where i got a not so nice step-mom who will do all those nasty things to me when i was younger. anyway those are history so i shall not dig them out again, just let time bury them. other than that, i guess i did enjoy my younger days playing masak-masak, nitendo games, softball, marbles, catching, brick game, etc etc. life is so much worryless except when i did not do well for my tests and exams.. haha..
entered secondary w/o even knowing how i managed to struggle thru. being in one of the lowest ranking secondary did open my eyes to the real world, ie people can be really ugly. people fight, people use vulgarities like its their 1st language, people steal, people copy during exams, people bully one another... i'm glad i did not turn out totally to be one of them. thanks for all the deep rooted moral education in me. nevertheless, i'm grateful to be in the real world as one teacher whom i know online told me that she was so shocked to realise this is the real world as her life for the past 20 odd years have been overly protected and people around her are all with high moral values.. oh well.. if she has been in the real world 10 years ago, i bet she will not say that anymore..
entered jc, national service and graduated from universities, i began to realise that people are more and more selfish. self has so much priority over others and everything is so much about me, me and me. so much so that its becoming my benefit even its at the expense of others. people not willing to share their notes, homework, assignments, all with the fear that others may do better than them. people just want to be better in studies than others to show their superiority. in national service, people try to sabo one another so that they can be in a more relax position and do less work. well, perhaps another way to look at it is survival. maybe survival comes at the expense of sacrificing others...
now into the society university and life is definitely not getting any better. friendship is no longer as simple as before as people love $$$ more than anything else. people willing to sacrifice friendship or befriend one another just to earn an extra buck. i encountered not once but twice. i have always wanted to catch up with long time no see friends but what is in their mind is not simply to meet up, but to introduce aka sell some products to me. yes, i'm disappointed. i'm also disgusted with people whho are in MLM coz they have left an impression in me tha they are more intrested in $$$ than anything else. i finally learnt that friendship can be sacrifice for $$$. material wants have overcame everything. love and relationship can be given up for the sake of car and money coz love no longer has its appeal. sex can be bought so does friendship. to have power and $$$ are in the minds of many and they are willing to do anything to gain them, be it backstab, cheat, corruption, bribery, the list goes on.. i guess being ruthless is their notion of survival and being powerful..
well.. i guess i have enough of all that.. maybe thats the reason why i have always yearn for a simple life, a life which distance itself from the complications of our society..