haven't had such a birthday for 3 years liao.... yup... a birthday that was spent alone....

dunno leh.... i think i like to have deep thoughts when alone... esp on some special occasions. its a long time i last reviewed about my life on my birthday. i feel tat its realli nice to review your life on the day u are born so that you can look back on what u have done for the past year(s) and in the mean time kinda look forward to/plan what is ahead. birthday is like a reference point... a point to see where you last set off and also the same point to see how much you have walked so far in life....

its really fast... 24 years juz passby like tat... how i wish everything can come to a pause so that i can have time to breathe... to realli have a good look around me... the people, the environment, the things.... life is juz so hectic... everything seems to be passing clouds.... everyday i'm so busy on things that i don't even have control of or of interest... but isn't that called university education? a paper qualification that almost everyone pursue? but is that realli important in today's context? who can guarantee a good paying job with an university education now? will jobs come so hard that i become a road sweeper one day?

what have i achieved in terms of non-academic stuffs? i'm too devoted to academic pursue that i tend to miss out on the non-academic stuffs. when is the last time i happily help someone needy? when is the last time i lend my haelping hands to those who needs my help? why..? what have i become other than study and study?

in terms of family relationship when is the last time i have a heart-to-heart talk with my parents? i dun remember i did that ever... what is the barrier between us? what is hindering me or them to allow us to blend together as any other families? why can't i juz start the ball rolling and hope that the momentum will be created?

in terms of BGR... i finally kinda understand what kind of person i'm thru the last relationship. i'm realli different from what i used to "think" i'm.... i'm not tat type of mr good guy that i "think" i'm... i'm not tat patience that i "think" i'm... i'm not that perfect bf that i "think" i'm... what i can do now is to slowly reflect about myself and change for the better during this time....

my resolutions for the coming year:
1. study hard and get a good honours (2nd lower and above)
2. interact more with my family
3. make more friends
4. study hard for my japanese
5. reflect myself and change for the better in terms of BGR
6. ......

will add on if i think of any....